Impressions of a Battlefield...aka Henceforth I am Your Mookieness...aka I valiantly try blowing a foot off again, but the feet are getting smarter

Important Edit at bottom of post. Well, ok...not important enough to put up here, but important enough I didn't want it totally missed by the mouth breathers and bottom feeders who might skim by here on their way to a fungokake site. [If you want the ultrasecret definition to that particular fetishism, it's gonna cost ya a dollar. Be warned, if you live to be 90, I doubt you'll get the soul properly cleansed after you hear it.] Now back to my well earned self-adulation.


And there we have it.

More evidence, if any was needed, that all this blog has to do is hear a wish and it will labour nonstop to make it a reality.

Yes kids, after writing about how The Mookie was the tournament I felt entitled too, the MWGB kicked it into high gear and took it down for me. Jo gets a lot of credit too – that girl is the Anti-Eric: she rails and I win shit. Simple. E, on the other hand, is like a mug of battery acid angrily thown on the face of my game to get even with it for dumping him. [Simile too long and complicated? Yeah…occupational hazard. If being me could be considered an occupation.]

Kudos, blog. Kudos. If it really is happening, let the rest of them die off unceremoniously, but thy eternal summer shall not fade. Indeed. As long lives this [ie. my higher cognitive functions] and this gives live to thee.

Signs it is Your Day:

1: You final table with guys you count among your inner poker-blogging circle.

I have to say, and all there agreed, Fuel got screwed by the deal when his reasonable JTs push met AA and JJ four-handed. Still mah boy actually predicted tonight was my night when I eked back from being down to 900 and doubled up a couple of times. I know you weren’t impressed with the A6s calling A2s, but I thought I knew what you were up to, I could afford it, and I was hoping you were playing mid-level suited connectors (I was close!). I can understand why that call smells, but like the title says, "signs it is your day"…BTW if anyone missed Fuel’s post on the Overbet For Value, you should read it…the added joke is that dummy’s name just happens to be Ike. Coincidence? You be the Judge. [Jordan sent a threatening letter, so I am not allowed to use the phrase You Decide anymore – that guy’s good!]

Two: Play KQo into AJ three-handed and live to tell.

How? Find both a Q and J on the flop. Next grimace uncomfortably when an A makes the turn. Squeal like a girl with you hit trips on 5th. I will say this was the only beat I am aware of during this run, but I could be wrong. Sorry ski – and again, apologies for venting frustration on you. Chacun son gout, the French like to say [although they annotate it better]. And no, that does not translate to, “suck on some goop.” Anyway, I was a jerk to say what I did. Having just spent the afternoon watching Molina on ESPN, all I can say is maybe that douchebag rubbed off on me transiently. You play your game, I’ll play mine. Heads up was enjoyable [man, am I results oriented].

Chapter Tres: This is how you kill off your closest friend in the blogosphere:

Goddamit blogger wont post the shot! Goot news! Don has it up - fuck it's pretty. He pushes 99 three-handed and short. I call with QQ. Flop? QQ9. Yeeeesh D. What can I say?

Oh yeah – Dems Quads Beetches! If that had been High Stakes Poker, you’d owe me like 1 million clams now.

~ Part the Fourth ~ Acts of Fate (God has better things to Do than watch me play poker) may Slash but for a change they don’t Burn.

I called Don’s 10k push with 92o. With a 24k stack. Not even I am that suicidal in the endgame. The arrow was on fold, and it was bizarre – as I went to click I could see the arrow sliding in slo-mo to Call. He made it just in time to drive those hapless lemmings into the sea: think Mutual of Omaha “documentary” circa 1976. Jebus I was tilted. Positive I had blown my chance right then and there. But as I said, not even that was going to stop the MWGB from flexing its unholy muscles. You guys should be very happy I am not using these powers for evil. Just selfish results-oriented id satisfaction.


Scene Five, Act Five: Not even the nut flush can touch you.

[Again thank blogger for the lack of visuals]
HeadsUp, I go Tourist with A7o (rapidly becoming my signature hand, eh Haley?) when i call ski's push on the flop. He's holding K5 spades and we're looking at an Ac9s3s flop. Turn sheds another 3, but last man out is the Ace of Spades to give our boy the nut flush. This was one of those hands, like the one that bounced me from the 20k about a month ago, where it took me a second to figure what went down. All hail the twice-paired board.

And that’s pretty much that. It’s been a good week at the blogger tables. Other places too. Bankroll growing steadily with my MTT-only strategy (yeah, I know it won’t last, but that’s cool – at the levels I play I can tolerate the loss of sunshine every once in a while).

I‘ve come to understand something fundamental to playing MTTs: losing should not surprise you. Winning (or hitting the big payoff spots) is what should surprise you. Even while you have to approach it with an expectation of success, actually attaining success in a given MTT should still surprise the shit out of you because a lot of fairly iffy propositions have to work out perfectly for you to get from A to Z in one piece. For me, I think the most realistic goal is to try to make the best decisions I can based on holdings, position and read – then hope that I am correct and that I have minimized the role of luck. After that, you just need to be able to stomach the brutal truth underlying poker and life – usually you’re screwed before you even begin.

Finally, I tried 3-tabling last night and didn’t find it nearly as confusing as I used to. I just couldn’t get it going in the 20k and the 40k, but I am certainly not blown away by the mad skillz in evidence over on Party. I am praying that smokkee took the 20k down, cause he was looking beautiful early. As for me, from the perspective of my ability to play poker, it really does feel like progress is being made on a number of fronts. Like I am wont to note: Yay Me - the secret agenda of every upstanding weblog, no?

Laytah.

EDIT: I made a new friend through Waffles' Blog. Scroll down to the bottom. Have I gone off the deep end? I was pretty loosey-goosey out of control in the (K)Not and the 20k tonight. Perhaps winning has gone to my head? Still, this little exchange with my new pet poodle James might be the weirdest road I've taken my vocab down in a while. Full points for using the word quiche as an active pejorative!